today

Wow, what a difference a couple of days makes.  I had two really awful days in a row.  The kids were extra high maintenance.  I was extra crabby and had zero tolerance for anything.  There was more sand in the doorways than usual.  Everyone was louder than normal.  Today is a new day.  The kids all woke up cheerful.  They cleared the table without complaining.  They "folded" the laundry on the couch and put their own stuff away.  And now all three of them are upstairs playing a game quietly together.  Do I hear a hallelujah?  I took a shower and am sitting on the couch with my laptop and a cup of coffee.  Another hallelujah.  We are going to leave soon to go look at a stroller I found on Craigslist and will then tackle our Trader Joe's grocery list.  That's always a happy place.  I feel like things are under control.  When things get out of control I easily freak.  I know that's why God allows things to get out of control in my own little world.  To teach me that I am not in control and to rely on Him.  I have no control over Steve's work schedule.  I have to trust.  I have no control over the condition of my kids' hearts.  I have to trust.  I have no control over what the day will bring.  I have to trust that His grace will get me through.  I do need to learn to control my own emotions when things are out of control and my tendency is to flip out.  My problems are not all solved.  Responsibilities are still looming.  Nothing in my life is all rosy and perfect.  It never will be.  And I'm okay with that--for today anyway.  :)